Tuesday, November 30, 2010

100th Post


Thank y'all for commenting on my blog posts over the past two years (and putting up with the random photos and my sometimes morbid sense of humor ;) ). I hope you have enjoyed reading them as much as I have enjoyed writing them :D It means a lot to have friends with whom I can share the big and small events of my life.

If you comment on this post, I will respond and tell you:

1. When was the first time I met you, and what thoughts crossed my mind.
2. What I think is your best quality.
3. One memory I have of you.

As a bonus, I'll also try to guess your favorite color :D

Thursday, November 25, 2010

A Tale of Two Turkeys

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

It was the spring of hope...

...it was the winter of despair.

It was the year of Our Lord, two thousand and ten.

It is likely enough that, rooted in the woods of Sherwood Oregon, there were growing trees already marked by the woodman, Fate, to come down and be sawn into boards, to make a certain movable framework with a sack and a knife in it, terrible in history.

There were a turkey of good build named Bruno and a turkey lacking one eye named Susanna on Shiloh Knoll Farm.

They had everything before them,

and nothing before them.

They were both going direct to heaven...

...they were both going direct the other way.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Ways to Increase Vocal Range - secrets revealed

Ways to increase vocal range:

(note: I have tried many of these with great success)

1. Have your singing partner alternate between stomping on your toes and calling you names.
2. Try to shift pages 5, 6 and 7 on top of 1, 2, 3, and 4 while accompanying on the piano, singing, and helping out the flute player.
3. Milk the cows in shorts and a tank top during snow season, then make sure you infect all of the basses with pneumonia.
4. Helium works wonders...
5. Find out your little sisters used your handmade quilt for their outdoor tea party... and left it on a dirt patch in the rain all night. Confront them.
6. Falsetto opera. Lots of vibrato.
7. Mind meld with Tim Storms.
8. Sing with a clarinet player who doesn't know how to transpose.
9. Sopranos can pretend they are outstanding counter-tenors.
10. Put the said sopranos on a caffeine and sugar diet at midnight.

I am available for personal consultation on these singing methods. $50 an hour with a materials fee, ask for my lesson policy and sign-up sheet.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

21st Birthday

Thanks, God, for these years of life and the friends and experiences you have given me.

I've kind of liked being born in the odd month of November. It is a month of Thanksgiving and remembrance.